How We Make New Friends at Camp

I was recently reading an article in Psychology Today that was titled “Make New Friends But Keep the Old… Or Not”.  It made me think of how many campers make new friends  that last a lifetime.  Is it due to the fact that they to learn to live with others despite their differences?  Could it be that having no screens (tv, cell phones etc…) encourages more conversations?  Maybe it’s that so many of the activities are geared towards personal and social development.  For example, when things may not be going their way at home they usually turn to you as parents for support but at camp they are more likely to look to their counselors and cabin mates.

We work daily at camp to foster these friendships by asking them to pick activities that they are interested in. This helps encourage like minded friendships to bloom.  At Camp Marimeta we work with conflict resolution often when cabin issues arise.  We encourage the girls to make new friends by placing them in different teams and groups for special events.  We also switch tables weekly to cultivate new relationships. With all that said, camp is a great place to help create lasting friendships, however camp is only 4 or 8 weeks of your daughters year.  It is difficult to change a child’s thought process or help them learn healthy social interactions that will stick with them in that small time frame.

Here are some ways you can help your child cultivate friendships at home during the school year:

1. Ask them, “How do you see yourself? How do you show people your values?” Make them do some soul searching, so they can find friends who will be a good fit.
2. Remind them that not everyone of their friends will be their BFF. There are many different kinds of friendships.
3. Work with them on their conversational skills. This may seem easy, but in todays digital world it is much harder then we think it is for them. Ask them to keep the conversation positive and upbeat. Moreover, encourage them to actively listen.
4. Teach them to fight fair. Friends will argue and that is o.k., but that doesn’t mean the relationship has to end, if they can learn to take a step back when needed.
5. Be careful how you express your opinions when speaking  to your children about their friends.  If you have a strong opinion regarding their friendships, watch the way you word it.  Your opinion is valued and you want to get it across effectively.
6. Help your child develop meaningful relationships with other adults. In fact, having these stable realtionships will help them navigate the ups and downs of teenage friendships.

Reference: Ways to Help Your Teen make and Keep Good Friends